It all started with A Nonsense Christmas. I gave “Espresso” some shit earlier last year. However, after repeated exposures, Sabrina Carpenter has charmed me with her feminine wiles, her sparkly outfits, and her endless commitment to her own bits. The girl is nothing but consistent, and A Nonsense Christmas Netflix special following a few Grammy nominations was the logical next step in cementing her into 2020s female pop stardom. This Barbie knows how to have fun!
That same week, however, I noticed a frequent ‘for breakfast’ subject appear in sharp opposition. If Sabrina Carpenter is having the most fun, who lies on the other side of the spectrum? Look no further than Taylor Swift — fresh off of her 149-show world tour that sold a whopping $2,077,618,725 in tickets.
The cultural moment that earned Taylor the bottom spot in this ranking was the Eras Tour Book controversy. Copy errors, missing pages, low-quality screenshots, and a general lack of effort placed into yet another piece of Swift merch indicate some pretty sad truths about Taylor Swift the conglomerate AND Taylor Swift the recording artist.
Is it too far to say Taylor Swift may just hate her fans? I’m not sure, but I do know that a pop star having true fun doesn’t make you question that.
Of course, all of these issues are connected, right? Part of Taylor’s recent gig has been the chart battles that her label/her team can’t help themselves from wading into. Namely, Taylor strategically selling album variants at the last hour to block Charli XCX from going #1 in the UK for brat still leaves a bad taste in my mouth.
Now, Charli? She knows how to party.
I want to conduct a Pop Star State of the Union as we near the Grammys. In a very special, first-ever podcast(!), for breakfast goes auditory to do a ranking of how much fun I think the women of modern pop are having. And don’t worry, I mention the misogyny…
Here’s who I’ll be discussing in no particular order. To see how things shook out give me a listen!
Sabrina Carpenter
"It feels like Sabrina is living the dream.”
Taylor Swift
“I don’t understand how someone who is constantly obsessed with their control and their autonomy can turn around and give their fans such subpar crap… often.”
Olivia Rodrigo
“She’s too sane.”
Doechii
“Once you know of Doechii, you’re a fan of Doechii.”
Chappell Roan
“Do you want to be the biggest pop star in the world or do you want to be the one with morals and ethics and a backbone?”
Beyoncé
“She’s simply too big to be here.”
Charli XCX
“If Sabrina Carpenter (or Chappell Roan*) has had the best year in pop music, Charli has had the best year in pop culture.”
Billie Eilish
“I want her to be like Luca Guadagnino!”
Dua Lipa
“If I had to choose to be a pop star, I’d probably choose Dua Lipa…”
Tate McRae
REFERENCES
I tried to capture all of the media that I mentioned during the podcast. If I’m missing anything just ask me, and I’ll find it!
Billboard’s Greatest Pop Stars of the 21st Century: No. 1 — Beyoncé
Billie Eilish x FINNEAS Interview
Chappell Roan’s January 2025 BBC Radio 1 Interview
{Re: Chappell Roan} “The anxiously attached have won the internet” from
The Annenberg Inclusion Initiative’s Inclusion in the Recording Studio Study
Doechii DENIAL IS RIVER Music Video
And if you’ve scrolled this far, you deserve a song of the blog:
I thought it best to (mostly) remain pop star neutral for this pick.
I really can’t get enough of this track, and I hope you heard my enthusiasm come through on the pod for this whole FINNEAS album!
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